USA Trip 2010

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Captain Hook and Mellow Steady Flow 2 May2010

Tony Dick and I had a great day on the Ledge yesterday.

I first failed on Captain Hook in Dec 1986 with Clive Curson when I dislocated my thumb and suffered reversing the rail. I have tried the route many times since then and yesterday, despite a very hot and sweaty walk up IV with my family, did the tea thing and then at last put to rest one of my last great vendettas. The move round the roof is well protected by two bomber small cams - effectively a top rope - but the move itself is probably one of the hardest single moves I have ever done. The Ape index is quite critical for this move - even and especially if one does the knee bar. So the ostensible grade of 23 is rather irrelevant to me considering that I recently climbed 5 or 6 pitches at Milner graded 25 or 26, Africa Arette 25 and Prime Time Direct E56a (25).

Feeling quite stoked and confident Tony and I then went off to do Mellow Steady Flow 23. Tony led the first grade 21 pitch which I screwed up doing the move off the ground using the wrong hand. But I redeemed myself by on-sighting the next two "heady" pitches 20 and 23. The 23 pitch is rarely done and is extremely thin and intimidating. 2 very very old pegs mark the route and inspire no confidence. But they can be backed up by tiny but very good nut and cam placements. (Aliens or Metolius mastercams). Tony tried to give me the beta but it really does not help. Everyone will climb that pitch a little differently as it is size and reach dependent. So if anyone gets to do it, just work it out for yourself and take a selection of tiny cams with you and small nuts and RP's. The pitch is quite safe if you have the where-with-all and forearms to place the extra gear which requires some clinging on. And one then needs some reserve to finish the move to the ledge above which is off very small and not-so-positive crimps and foot holds. I rate this pitch at least as hard as Africa Arette first pitch and is comparable to Eternity Road 23 w.r.t. gear placements and difficulty.

Although it is scary it is actually quite safe but your belayer must be alert and watchful. This route is really worth doing and a brilliant test piece at the grade and it simply must get more ascents...

Towerkop and adventure of Epic Proportions

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A Not So Slack Time on Slack Time Yellowwood Amphitheatre Western Cape 17 Febuary 2010

It is my norm to set aside Margaret and my first liaison and wedding anniversary day for a very special occasion. This auspicious event occurs on the 18 February, it being our 21^st and 26^th anniversary respectively. My main aim in so doing is to go big and make it memorable. I usually succeed but the quandary always is whether to throw money at it – flowers, champagne, dream meal, romantic setting, double dose Viagra (for her of course), new triple speed vibrator, etc. etc.

Or, to go on an epic adventure.

I could not resolve the dilemma satisfactorily so I decided to do both. And so it was done.

To make the adventure more sociable I gathered together a motley crew of 3 unfit, underprepared and inexperienced mates of whom only 2 had any big wall experience many years ago.

So let’s start with the fact that we had only two head torches between the 5 of us.

It started badly: at 02h00 on Wednesday 17^th Lucy – age 5 - came through to the marital suite completely beside herself because she woke up in a state of despair that “hairy hairy”was leaving her.

That was not the end of it; Nick our 11 year old son (almost 12) woke up as we were about to leave at 05h00 and burst into tears because he was missing out on his unalienable right to 15 minutes preschool cuddles. Ho hum. Yawn!

We were strong, we were resolved and we prevailed and left them in their misery deciding we would leave in abeyance the decision as to whether they should undergo trauma counseling now or later.

SMSes to our mates, coffee and we were off. Things went spiffingly for a while: We all met on time at the Du Toit’s kloof lodge and Margaret and I left our van there as it was ready to whisk us off to the romantic chapter of our anniversary. Animated conversation saw us hike the trail to the base in just 100minutes. That’s fast, even for seasoned Yellowwood regulars. We made tea and set off for the start:

Charles racking up- Robert waiting

Margaret donning her harness

I led off, followed by Margaret and Mark Straughan who struggled on the short approach traverse to the beginning of the climbing. This was a bad omen but thought “let’s see how it goes”. He then proceeded to weight the rope – a very skinny 8.1mm ice-floss rope - on more than one occasion but the first belay ledge was attained uneventfully. Deon and Robert followed as a separate party and I only found out some two days later that Robert had taken a 5 m fall on the traverse when a foot hold broke.

I started up the 2^nd pitch (grade 20) marking critical foot holds with chalk. Again the rope was tested and stretched – this time by both Margaret and Mark - despite leaving several slings for assistance. My belay, consisting of an RP3 and a marginal rock 1 and the friction of my butt would have been viewed with disdain by any self respecting mountain guide. (Despite Mark having shed some 17kg and the nom de plume of Jelly Belly bestowed on him by his kids in the last 12 months since he became psychotic about climbing, he is still no light weight!)

When Margaret reached the belay said to me at this very early stage that the climbing was way too hard for her and Mark and that she was not having fun. I gave her my best dead pan poker face look of empathy and decided to bide my time.

Margaret noshing sweets at the 2^nd stance

RP3 belay above her!

It appears Mark was already cramping so badly while sitting on the ledge below that there were several minutes’ delay before he could get up. He, according to Deon, was dead locked in a sitting position and could not move. I thought it quite comic really.

I quietly thought about the fact that we were about a rope length above the deck and this would be a good time to bail or at least lower Mark to the ground.

Mark attained the ledge after going off route way left but managed not fall off and swing dangerously into the corner where he would have smashed a wrist or broken his ribs. Of course there was a minor epic hauling the pack which tangled in Mark’s rope as I belayed him.

Mark chirpy as always finishing pitch 2:

Note the cramped fingers of his right hand.

A passage in MacFarlane’s book, Mountains of the Mind came to me then:

“Risk taking brings with it its own reward. Life, it frequently seems in the mountains, is more intensely lived the closer one gets to its extinction, we never feel so alive as when we have nearly died!”

Deon on the second belay: He is still having fun

Mark’s enthusiasm infected Margaret inappropriately i.e. positively and I set up off the next pitch saying deceitfully that the climbing gets easier.

Charles leading off on pitch 3.

Margaret starting the pitch: is she smiling?:

I left aid slings again and made the next ledge. Margaret battled, Mark struggled and Robert whimpered – a little - while passing by the large loose flake that had completely terrorized Margaret a few minutes before. I watched bemused from above. Deon later trundled it. The noise of a massive rocks crashing down was very off putting for Margaret and added another dimension to being psyched out. The block was so big you could smell the cordite-like smell wafting up. 5 Klipspringer bokkies were seen bolting away.

Robert getting to the 3^rd

stance

Deon following pitch 3

Mark: Grimace or Smile and Margaret belaying on the next pitch

The next pitch was more forgiving and was free climbed by everyone except Mark as he passed the Monster jammed in flake.

Margaret on Pitch 4 waving???

Mark bypassing the monster flake and

stretching his cramping hands

I went up the next right facing corner and made a hanging stance short of the jumbo ledge so I could see Mark and Margaret and give them beta.

Mark and Margaret at the 4th stance: Note Marks cramped posture:

Deon coming past the Humongous flake

By this time my hands were really sore from hauling my climbing partners on very skinny ropes and I was also cramping. We were only half way up. We then more easily attained the face below the Krakadouw type cracks on the right and an exit gully on the left.

We waited and Deon and Robert did not appear. The sun was frying us by now and Mark started replacing “s” with “th” as his tongue swelled from dehydration. He did not dare sit down for fear of cramping and he laughed with glee as he had to pull his fingers straight with his teeth. (He stayed on his feet till we got to the car at about 01h00!)

We shouted and yelled and when more time passed, I decided to abseil down. I found Robert and Deon in a hanging stance off route to the right. I could not contain my frustration and let out several choice expletives…..

Of course that does not facilitate anything and Deon gave me back as good as I gave threatening to jump off the mountain. After some more fucking around we all assembled at the base of the gully.

We having fun yet? Shade at last!

I decided to go for the gully on the left as it seemed a little easier than cracks on pristine rock to the right and I headed up the first section that started on excellent rock for about 15m. But then I was faced with a very tricky move – probably grade 19 – with a 10m run out and a deck fall. Robert was leading behind me and he would not be comfortable doing this. I did the move feeling very gripped and continued up the gully that became chossy with dangerous loose rocks but got to a stance at full rope stretch 60m above.

I belayed Robert past the tricky bit and we all made the top safely.

The end is nigh….

Another mishap occurred then. I coiled the ropes and sent Mark and Margaret ahead to scramble the last 60m to the top. They went further east than what I did and got stuck. The way I went was also very tricky and I was pleased they did not come this way. Little did I know. I did not find them and haired off to the top only to reverse with very sore toes in my cramped climbing shoes. I found them and threw down a rope to belay them.

After some more delays because Mark, who was completely trashed by now, insisted on carrying a rope – he could barely talk and walk – reached the abseil chains on Down Time. The first abseil is probably one of the most exciting and scary abseils anyone can do. It goes over major overhangs and one dangles free from the cliff 200m above the deck. The first one to descend must place gear to keep the rope against the rock and the second set of chains is at a point where there is less than 30cm left of the rope!

Both Mark and Margaret reached the ledge completely shattered but by now I knew that things were on a winning streak. Short of getting our ropes stuck we would get down before dark. Deon made the dry comment that “Die son trek water, mense’’. I was calm but tense and very focused. I forgot that there was limited experience amongst my partners when it came to handling ropes and flying off into space on abseils.

I used the second set of ropes to reach the halfway ledge and I rushed down the next rappel on the first set of ropes forgetting to remind Robert about the ropes twisting when pulling the ropes from the second set of chains. They got stuck. We now only had one set left!

Meanwhile, a side show was going on at the halfway ledge and Deon wrote this: .”

“We were trying to free the ropes after the second abseil and were concerned that with all the tugging we would knock a rock off the ledge onto you guys.

Robert then picked up the rock and moved it to the left of the ledge to get it out the way only to reveal a black scorpion. I then moved it aside with an alien and we noted it in the middle of the ledge as we continued tugging away. We also did not want to it toss over the ledge in case it landed on you. You then advised us via cellphone to move to the left of the ledge and to free the ropes from the side. Our problem then was that the scorpion was not to be seen anymore so we found ourselves tugging at ropes with a scorpion on the loose.

The third abseil ends on a tiny ledge that was extremely crowded with the five of us and it was almost pitch dark and only 2 torches between us. I went down that last abseil which ends about 10m above the ground on a tiny foot rail whence one must scramble down. Deon and Margaret both struggled with this so Robert and Mark abseiled to a slightly higher ledge where there was an abseil point. But the second set of ropes got stuck after pulling it down for a few metres. Fortune smiled and there was just enough rope for them to get to the ground with stretch.

We composed ourselves.

Tea, water and food followed and at least it was cool.

I found a large dram of Malt whisky that I had left on a previous visit with Dave Vallet and this lifted our spirits.

And then – armed with only 2 torches – we embarked on the arduous, strenuous, tenuous and tedious scramble down to the car which took us 3 hours. There was to be one final mishap. Margaret needed to wee and at the time we were on a very steep and narrow part of the trail. She went ahead a few metres and all torches were switched off. Things seemed fine till she got up only to find that she had missed the trail but not her pants that flapped wet against her legs all the way down. We all fell over, ruined our shins and grabbed spiky bushes more than once. We drank beers at the van and I had to hand over the driving to Margaret as I could not stay awake- she ultimately proved the be the strongest one! We had been at it for 23 hours non-stop!

The next day Margaret and I went to Karoo1 Hotel and Village aka Karbonaatjies Kraal where we had a stellar romantic interlude under a star-lit sky with the milky way seeming almost touchable. I undeniably proved that for your relationship to last with your wife you must multi-fuckup – preferably with her along as a victim - and follow this up with great sex. Girls you must ensure you send your boys out climbing and multi-fuck-upping and then….. well, you know the answer.

There are at least five lessons to be learnt:

1. Never take anyone on a trip like this who on the one hand has only done Arrow Final on a top rope but who has extreme resolve, tenacity, endurance, staying power, fortitude, stamina, paraatness, steadfastness, determination, doggedness, perseverance, single mindedness and persistence to top out on Yellowwood and extend the day so he could share the first couple of hours of Margaret and my anniversary. (I am talking here about Mark Straughan). He surpassed himself indeed.
2. When you think you are not having fun, you actually are having some of the best fun you ever will.
3. When you are immersed in an epic adventure such as this, do not bail – ever! If you keep it together you will ultimately bring the out the best in your friends and yourself and you will realize that you can conjure up more strength than you ever thought you had. From the departure points of “I can’t or won’t” and “never again” you will change to “I can” and “I will”!
4. No matter how tired and sore you are, you can still go on and celebrate your anniversary in romantic style under a star-lit sky on the same day.
5. And you have to do this kind of thing if you want a set of buns and legs like this at the age of 46:

The challenge is out there for any group of mates. 5 of us climbed a 9 pitch route of 240m height on the main wall of Yellowwood in a day from Cape Town. Only one of us had big wall experience. At least 3 pitches were grade 19 or harder. Our average age was 48+

Fun Time - A new route on Yellowwood Butress

11 February 2010.

FA C Edelstein, T Firman and F Davids

After all the vitriol that emanated from the bolting that the visiting German climbers did at Yellowwood I decided to go up there and deal with the problem. I fished out a builder’s hammer from my tool box and with Farrell and Tristan set out for Yellowwood at 05h30 in the morning on the 12 Feb 2010. The forecast was for 36 degrees C heat and I found solace in the fact that this was to be a training day and that I could improve on the 1.4kg I had shed from the barrel that was beginning to replace the six pack embedded in my rectus abdominis. (Go Google it…)

On the way up I thought better of my intentions and decided that the way to keep the destroyers away from this sanctuary of trad climbing was to open all the lines on trad. And the best way to do so efficiently was to start with the easier lines. The mandate to Tristan and Farrell was that we had to top out, no pitch must be harder than 19, the route must be safe and therefore steep and on good rock and the pro must be bomber.

We succeeded in fine style except for one pitch that can easily be fixed.

So this was the first one and there are plenty to come.

Slack Time is a seriously traddy trad route on good gear on steep rock. The photo has been taken off to the right side and is not ideal and gives the impression that the route is not straight.

But in fact it is mostly a direct line. Watch this space for a better photo and topo.

The climbing for its grade is very consistent and the rock quality is mostly excellent with Krakadouw type rock at the top. The pro is excellent and loose rock and vegetation is avoidable. It needs a few ascents to refine it and rid it off the odd flora and loose rock that is inherent on this kind of route. Experienced trad climbers can probably top out before the sun bakes the place and it would make a fine alternative to a day on the ledge doing Atlantic Crag and Jacobs Ladder -again!. It is technically easier than No More Bells but more accessible and it does require more “big wall” competence and temperament as retreating will require some experience at doing so on big cliffs.

It won’t be surprising if a route such as this becomes a very popular big wall country route and there are more to be done.

Pitch 1 : (19)Walk left along a ledge system to a cairn. Traverse low below an overhang past a green bush and step down after 5m to end below a steep white face. Climb up the right facing corner and exit left above it to a small ledge with a bush.

Pitch 2 : (20) Climb directly up from the ledge past the thin crux(tiny cam). Continue to the large left facing corner and up this to a comfy ledge.

Pitch 3 : (19) Move right and do a tricky stem move in a grey groove and continue diagonally right to the large overhang. Traverse left to a blocky stance.

Pitch 5 (16) and 6: (18/19) Climb diagonally right to the monster sized pillar and traverse to the right at its base. Continue up and right to a right facing corner and exit diagonally left to a bushy stance. These pitches can be combined.

Pitch 7 : (14) Climb up and left and up easy rock to a stance below shiny grey rock and easy cracks 15m right.

Pitch 8 : (17) Climb the crack system to the next ledge and stance

Pitch 9 : (20/21) Climb the overhanging jamb crack and continue up the steep crack and face to a stance on the right below a right facing corner. (Krakadouw pitch *****)

Pitch 10 : (18) Climb the corner and continue past a short chimney crack above. Continue up the left facing corner and exit left and then find your way to the top

Scramble off.

FA: C Edelstein, F Davids and T Firman Summer 2009 FA Pitch 9 "Krakadouw" pitch C Edelstein and Neels Havenga 20 Jan 2010

The Pit of Despair

We forsook the overtures of the Yates’ to ply us with a masterful collection of South Africa’s finest wines including most if not all the Platter 5 star ones and headed off to Hellfire with our kids and young Charlie Yates. As usual Lucy, now 5, stormed up the slope and we were greeted at the Pit of Despair by a bellow from Charlie who could not contain himself when he saw the deep dark cavern in the torch light.

“Awesome…..’’

We descended into the pit and Margaret undid her voluminous pack from her shoulders and I dropped mine to the ground in great relief. Between us we had carried up and “eco-braai,” 15 litres of water, climbing gear for 6 of us and all the other bits of pieces. The kids passed out 2/3 the way through dinner.

We slept fitfully and as usual, I had to deal with the resident rastus at least 3 times.

Nymphette in the PIT!

We all climbed an easy route then next day and then fulfilled and exhausted we descended to the road and I cycled back to Du Toit’s Kloof lodge to fetch our vehicle….


Pretty cool.!

Margaret and
Charlie Yates





















Duncan climbing

This is what happens to sponsorship money.

It is my experience with sponsored climbers that they do not respect other people's money, time or property. They are happy to blow it or drill it away. They get speeding fines in your vehicle you lent them and they don’t pay, they use and abuse and lose your gear and don’t make good. They give back chopped ropes. They abuse your hospitality and your telephone and leave your place a mess. They feel entitled and life owes them something. Etc etc. They give nothing in return, although sometimes, if you are lucky, you get a thank you.

Sponsored climbers are banned from my house as guests.

Spot the bolt next to bomber gear!
So Joe Mohle and I were at Yellowwood yesterday and we climbed Your Mother His Face first 5 pitches to the halfway ledge.


The Germans claimed they placed 6 bolts and a few pegs on their route “Your Mother His Face’’. ‘’We used only 6 bolts on 9 pitches, because of our style, the TraSchlaBo-style (that means Trad-Piton-Bolt). At the belays there are always one bolt and one piton/cam or rock’’.

There were 13 bolts on the 5 pitches and 10 bolts at the stances up the halfway ledge. Total 23 bolts on the first half of the route. There were 4 pegs of which 1 was loose and therefore dangerous. At least 3 bolts were at the same level of bomber trad gear. Most of the bolts were 8mm! I counted a total of 3 that I considered were appropriate as fixed gear and that I may have placed in a similar situation although I would have left fixed nuts instead with slings or whatever. No bolts were glue-ins. So we have 8mm expansion bolts on YW!!!

No bolt is absolutely essential to save you from a deck fall or anything that may seriously injure you.

Joe in fact took a long fall off a tricky move onto two smallest aliens that I placed but I had backed off the move. The earlier bolt was completely unnecessary with two good cams just below and an RP3 (bomber) at the same level. You do a simple but very reachy crank to a jug with the bolt above your waist.

I know several British trad climbers that are capable of climbing that route without any fixed pro at all and I reckon even Clinton would do it as would several South African climbers in the past. Armageddon direct is bolder than any pitch on that route. They should have climbed that first!

Their route to the halfway ledge has some excellent climbing but so does every route at YW. There must be 20 unclimbed lines at YW. Their route does not follow any particular line and involves a lot of slab climbing in-between natural lines. It is what I would call an eliminate – a route you squeeze in once everything else has been done.

The grades of the first 5 pitches are – I think – 23, 24, 25/6 25/6 19. Joe freed all the moves. I lost interest after the 2nd pitch.

I found lots of shit and toilet paper completely exposed within 5 metres of the start of their route and just 3 m from the base of the wall. I know which South Africans have been there in the last 2 months and it isn’t them.

The climbers from Germany have lied in the media about their TRAPIBO. They placed a lot more bolts than stated in writing and many are completely unnecessary. Maybe the Dark Side name of their other route has something in it…

The question still has not been answered. Did they show any respect to the area, its ethics, its routes, its history and the previous ascentionists by doing any of the existing routes? If not, then I have no interest in them as climbers. They are just the same scumbags as everyone else that’s on the take pretending to be nice so they can get more of other peoples’ money to aggrandize themselves…

The German guys heard that they could take a drill to YW.

I am making it loud and clear that what they did is not acceptable. They can drill their own country…

Nick ran th 800m today

I advised him to start slow. He jogged at the back and the sprinted the last 200m as if his butt was on fire.....

The Ledge today with Tony Dick 28 Jan 2010

The Ledge at TM was very windy today so we went round to do Finale (19) a route Tony has never done. The cold rock made the holds in the rail feel smaller than normal. Finished off the 2nd pitch of Don't Squeeze I'll Laugh (21) and then we did the second ascent of the newly found last pitch of Boulder Highway (20) - not 22 as graded in the book. I have called this Stairway to Heavan as the upper part has not been done before as could be inferred from the lichen and loose bits of rock.

We then went and did a superb direct version of Jacobs's Ladder (19) and finished off on Myrrh (22)

Sport climbing is dead but bolting is a Tsunami

47? Cool. You call yourself rocklooney. Well that's me too.

Trad is hard to get into, hard to do well and hard to justify doing. No glory really, nobody cares what route you have done. "'Nobody,'' as in the glam sponsored dudes wants to do them. I even conceived a movie about it. (Tea for three).

Recently sponsored glory seeker German dudes came to Yellowwood and claim to have drilled a mere 9 "essential'' bolts on a new route. I counted more than 40, some next to cracks and at least one on the first pitch of a new route that I have been developing. As far as I know they did not even climb the local classics. And if they did, it's not sexy enough so they ain't telling.

I heard today some Spanish dudes have also been there and placed a few less ''essential'' bolts. I wonder if they climbed Prime Time - a mere 23 grade pitch that has yet to receive an on-sight free ascent. But again, they probably will get kudos for a few nice pics and a big number on one or two pitches with comfy bolts in the ''essential'' places.

And guess why they came. Because of a bolted route called Newborn grade 29. Big no and very sexy. A route that probably less than a hand-ful of SA climbers are capable of climbing - but there are bolts, lots of them. Those same climbers would have a slim chance of on-sighting Prime Time (a mere 23, not sexy-yes?).

In no time, if this goes on YW will just be another bolted crag and it will face the same problems as that other un-mentionable place. (There is a meeting tonight in CT with interested climbers as to how to keep it safe from over-use and from the bolt gunners.)

It is easy to aggrandize one-self with a drill in hand and a big number on your route. Climbing mag will give you $100 for the pic and more for the article. And the equipment companies will throw money and gear at you so that they sell lots of stuff to wannabe's who see your pics and read your articles. (Remember I am in in the business so I know!).

At Blouberg (and elsewhere in SA) there are three routes that have no equal in SA or anywhere in the world. 25, 26 and 30+ (I could only free climb the first two) But the 3rd is still really worth doing at 25 A1. They all happen to have bolts on them and I drilled most of them. But they are still full-on trad routes and nobody is likely to go and on-sight them in the next 30 years which is probably the rest of my short life. Not one of those routes have ever been climbed without me present and the first one has been there for some 13 years now.

It's sad how few people will get out of there comfort zone. My 11 year old has walked up to Yellowwood, my 4, 7 and 11 year olds to Blouberg in a mere 4 hours 10min and we are all planning to go to Tower Kop in the next hols. I asked Ed February for the beta and he replied today:

1. Easter it can snow up there. This is a real mountain.
2. regardless it will be cold so take a wooly jumper.
3. There is a cave so accommodation not a problem.
4. The walk is +4 hours.
5. Start in the afternoon of day one and camp halfway at an old abandoned shepherd shed thing. May not still be there but its on a flat area with a stream and you can see the final steep bit.
6. To get to the summit is a rock climb of about grade 16. The route to do is Nefts route. This oke Neft was the first person to summit the mountain. He climbed the route on his own but nobody believed him so he went back again and left his socks on the top.

Great mountain. Real proper mountain.

ed

Check out: http://sites.google.com/site/towerkopin ... nformation

Hey, how can you resist....

The big problem with drill happy and esp. sponsored sport climbers is that they cannot leave anything alone. Give them half a chance and they will drill everything - even Yellowwood. Trad climbers don't go and ruin anything that I know of.......I will be removing the bolts placed by any dudes on my routes as long as I am able....

Bolting is a tsunami and it is gradually overtaking all the crags in the world and destroying our inherent commitment to adventure as human beings. Why don't the bolters go get their kicks like most people and fiddle their thumbs on playstation, smoke dope, take drugs, drink, drive quadbikes and motorbikes, gamble and get their kicks and kudos that way. It's not as if there aren't enough bolted climbs in the world. Leave some adventures for the next generation and the one after that and after that.

This is on Climb.co.za today UK climbing year end sport climbing article:

http://www.ukclimbing.com/articles/page.php?id=2417

Very sexy.

Near the end it says: "'Dozens of guys have climbed 9a's, but we don't have space to mention them all.''

So it seems you don't get kudos even if you climb 30+ on sport now. You have to bolt something...

So, yes I do agree with Hector, sport climbing is certainly dead when it comes to adventure and commitment but bolting is only too alive.

I have no problem with sport climbing and sport climbers. It is the bolters that I have a problem with and the hundreds of thousands of routes will become millions and it will never be enough....

Sabi Park, backflips in the pool and ML's in White River Jan 2010

Margaret Lucy and I went to Sabie Park this weekend. It was hot and so we spent hours in the pool. Lucy spotted Elephants at the bridge, M bought a ring at the hotel shop. Lucy did backflips in the pool and we had good sex to boot.

Schutte attorneys had work for me in White River and they are the most organized attorneys ever.

It was a great break. I did 100 pull-ups and many laps in the pool....

Yellowwood Amphitheatre maintains its allure and enticed me up there on Saturday 2 January 2010.  My victims were Dave Vallet and Nick, none other than my 11 year old son.  As always, I had a plan, and a back-up plan.  But a comedy of errors confounded all my plans and as a consequence Yellowwood remains a place that: “has a reputation for delivering the quintessential challenging multi-pitch trad routes of a very high standard and that requires above average skill, fitness and experience to complete a route in good style.  Many attempts by even very competent climbers to top out are often thwarted by the steep and intimidating rock and also the afternoon sun and other factors that can result in the upper pitches seeming 2 grades harder than indicated in the route description.”

Firstly, despite the benign weather forecast for Sunday the 3 January, it was sweltering hot on the Saturday and Nick with a rather overwhelming dose of Scottish ancestry genes that has bestowed red hair, sparkling and piercing blue eyes, freckles, a fair skin and a poor heat exchange system in him, wilted in the 37 degree heat.  David had dropped us off at the 1st electric pylon that was in line with the Yellowwood and then driven his vehicle to the Du Toit’s Kloof Lodge 4.7km away.  His rucksack was about the same weight as mine but included a litre of Coke, 2 beers, half a litre of whisky, half a litre of milk,1.5 litres of water, food - including the essential Grabouw boerewors – and all besides his personal gear. 

My pack included a laptop, 3 spare batteries, a DS playstation including the charger??? (WTF? How did that get in) , an I –pod, a harness and boots for Nick and various other paraphernalia related to doing a “hard core” route on Yellowwood. 

We were to carry both packs until Dave caught up with us.  This was not to be.  We considered it prudent and expedient to leave Dave’s pack at the firs pylon which is about 5 minutes above the road, very visible on a big white rock for him to collect on the way up and he could decide what if any he carried of “litre of Coke, 2 beers, half a litre of whisky, half a litre of milk, and 1.5 litres of water, food….including the essential Grabouw boerewors – all besides his personal gear.” Oh, I forgot to include the sugar, gas etc etc etc….

Nick and I sweated up the hill

and from time to time I phoned and SMSed Dave to ensure that he knew, as pre-planned that if we could not cope, we would leave his pack at the designated spot at the first pylon.  He did not answer his phone and this did cause significant concern but we nevertheless shouldered on in the steamy heat.

He caught up with us when we were about halfway or so up that very steep and fore-shortened hike and of course, he had not found the pack having gone to the pylon not where he had dropped us….. He also had left his cell phone in his pack…. The mind boggles indeed! 

And to top it all, he thought then it appropriate that I should go down and fetch his pack despite the fact that I had unloaded it of 1.5l of water and had carried my pack and Nick’s up the hill.  Of course I am just a mere 51 years old of pure brawn and muscle and he is in his early thirties having recently climbed Mont Blanc 5 times or so and done some serious hard core skiing down some outrageous couloirs in the Alps. (Dave I need the you tube link here

I was firm and simply said that “this doesn’t work for me Dave” and sent him down on his un-merry way.  Since when, in the modern age, do you leave your cell phone aka back-up aka communication tool, in your ruck sack?

Nick and I were then benighted with one torch due to the delay and had a hungry sojourn at the base until Dave arrived and we had our boeries at 01h00.  This is not a great way to start on one of the hardest multi-pitch trad routes in SA “Prime Time!.”   I set the alarm for 04h30 to the lamentations and gnashing of teeth of Dave, lubricated by whisky which he did indeed find the fortitude to bring up the mountain….

The saga continues…..

Sunday 6 January 2010.

Nick was asleep in Lucy’s Micky Mouse bag.



I extracted myself from Lucy’s newer pink sleeping bag. I made coffee. True to www.weathersa.co.za it was cloudy and cool. I uncoiled the ropes and managed to unfurl Dave from his sleeping bag and after making vitriolic and disparaging remarks about the bolt that the “Germans” (I can think of several politically incorrect terms) had placed on the first pitch Dave set off and did a very fine and efficient ascent on lead at grade 22. I followed the pitch and I must add that the crux is very awkward technical stemming move that I have no confidence that I could climb without falling off next time. So is it 23?

I then set off up the pitch that I have coined the Nemesis – at least until that day. It starts off with a tricky stemming move with a fall factor 2 and you get to a good point of stability where there is a rail that takes a 3.5inch and a 3 inch cam. And then the coffee and the fear got the better of me. (Nick was still below us fast asleep enveloped in Micky). Dave warned me, he threatened me – I think he got angry too (never seen that before). I had to have a piss! The wind was up, blowing from the east (left). Nick was below us remember…. Just 30m or so below. I still had to piss!!!!!

I did!

Again lamentations, grumblings, threats, promises of being drawn and quartered wafted up from Dave to me through the mist that was accumulating despite my assurance that urine remained sterile for at least 20 seconds. But the pressure dropped under my harness and I could continue up into the fear and loathing that was the crux of the pitch.

I lurched upwards and place the size 2 micronut, the size 1 BD nut and stepped out onto the face where I trembled and then controlled. I did the sketchy move up and had to snatch the thin rail (which anybody taller than 5’3” doesn’t notice) and found the rail to be as thin as ever. I toe’d off on the right foot nubbin and placed the oh-so-shallow blue alien and the even less confidence inspiring tiniest purple alien. The jugglet above defied me once and then I crimped it and hastily placed the tiniest BD micro-nut on my rack. (I was distraught to find that I did not have no 2 with me which is stronger and fits better). I was beginning to blow as I had done 3 time previously! And as I punch out these words 4 days later my forearms are still protesting with lactic acid). I felt the next move, the move. It is an impossible move to read. You are in a left facing shallow dihedral on small holds (which I usually excel at) and one has to find a fingertips gaston hold behind you with your right hand that is not visible – you have to know it’s there!). I tried it and my right deltoid swelled, creaked, then groaned and said NO!). I sagged back down.

“Dave, I can’t do this!” I cried.

He shouted obscenities up at me that translated means “you can, you must and if you don’t I will rip you to pieces….. or something like that.)

I tried again, my fingers strained, my right shoulder burned. I selected the further sloping micro-edge to place my left foot. (The closer one was too off balance.) I stepped up, grabbed the gaston and gave up and decided to pull on draw on the micro-nut. I grabbed it and yanked it to test it and let go.

Dave shouted something; I looked away from the tiny micro-nut and thought NOT about it or about the two micro-cams 2m below me. This is what trad climbing is about. A bolt or fixed piece would ruin the moment, the pitch, the route and the overall experience. This is the sharp and very thin edge of what makes me feel alive. It made me think of the song Life is Live by Opus.

I sagged down for a final shake out on the impossibly small edge below the micro-nut.

I went up again.

My left hand searched and valois! I found the thinnest, tiniest but sharp micro-edge that allowed me to bounce to the good hold above. It was done!

I bellowed with delight.

The saga continues….

The sensible thing to do now, would be to make a stance as one is on balance and arms are blown. But that would denigrate the pitch. I continued up the tricky stemming corner with the sneaky knee bar and up to the rail. I went right on to the arête and this time had the right sized cam. Pumped, I did the thin move to the flake and made the peremptory comment to Dave that the flake might exfoliate and I would see some air time. I reached up, the flake held and then it was a cruise up to the belay ledge.

I was elated and although I did the moves I give Dave at least 49% credit for the free ascent owing to his encouragement. He literally shouted me up the pitch. And that is how one sometimes does these things – with a little help from your friends. Or rather, a lot of help.

Dave then followed. He had been on the pitch before and after several disgruntled sounds he succumbed to the finer nuances of the technical difficulties and gravity and stretched the two ice floss ropes. He then worked the moves a few times and came up.

So this begs the question? How hard is the pitch? Well, between us we free climbed Africa Arette 25 on Africa Ledge recently which is a test piece for its grade. And this is as scary and technically probably harder on a very uncompromising wall. As I already intimated, a bolt would ruin it. For the record I would grade it 25 with beta but the on-sight as to affirm the difficulty.

Dave the led the next pitch (22) sailing through the first crux but got a little unstuck on the second crux which entails a difficult mantel move after a long run out with only a tiny cam in a very shallow slot for protection. He eventually did it the more forgiving way by down-climbing a few metres and then climbing up on the left.



I led the next 55m grade 21 pitch which had become quite overgrown and was more demanding than I remembered.
Yellowwood Amphitheatre maintains its allure and enticed


Reaching the half way ledge was a great relief and lunch was had.

After considering continuing up Prime Time we decided to rather find new pitches on trad before other climbers applied the soft option and bolted more pitches. We found a steep thin overhanging crack and I set off up it. It was thin, tricky, but by and large safe. I sort of climbed all the moves with rests on gear and I got to a point where Dave mentioned that it was 4 o’clock and we had to bail. (In fact it was 14h00). I had also run out of gear and needed more RP’s and nuts. Nick was at the base alone and Deon Van Zyl, who was meant to come up and re-supply us with whisky and boerewors sent me an SMS that he was being subjected to a tax audit of all things???? So we rapped off as, under the circumstances, I had to get Nick down the same day.

The rest of the descent was uneventful except the 4.7km walk into the sun back to the hotel to fetch my van while Dave “guided” Nick down to the road at a leisurely pace where I had left my pack and placed the beers and the litre of coke in the shade to cool for them.

So there it is: Yellowwood reigns supreme. The amphitheatre looms ominously above Du Toit’s Kloof. She is seductive and entices you into her cracks. Then she rejects and ejects you and you leaves humbled and emasculated. Again a concerted effort to top out was thwarted. It is truly awesome……It is the quintessential uncompromising and unforgiving trad crag. There is nothing else like it.