Turkeys and Eagles at the Ledge 26 February 2009

I was at the Ledge yesterday with Robert. Somehow, after his umpteenth attempt he "sent" Magentic Wall (grade 21 the reason being that to put out all the gear in the places he did made it at least that grade). 10 outa 10 for tenacity. He did it! He styled it! This is what climbing is all about. You try, you try, you fail and you try again. And hey. You do it. He did!!!!

Meanwhile, Tony and Darkhorse appeared and so did Hilton Davies and Bruce Daniels. One could call it an accidental TATWOC meet with one wannabe: Darkhorse aka Neil Havenga. Bruce and Hilton were cajoled, if not bullied, into doing an independent (albeit riddled with beta) ascent of the upper 3 pitches of Africa Edge. At the end of it I was throat hoarse (if not Dark Horse) from giving Hilton move by move and piece by piece and number by number beta on every inch of the route. But by golly gumdrops the old F***ker did it in sorta good style. At the last pitch he had to wait for me to abseil past and talk him up the arête. There he was lying on his back having placed the gear sunning himself on the ledge. I detailed exactly how you do it and once he turned around, did the mantel back-step and found the little divot on the edge he got it. Their ascent confirms the on-sight grade at 22. But once you know the tricks there is hardly a move harder than 20 on the whole route. He was coerced (by me) into agreeing that it was an “all time classic” on the Ledge. And indeed it is. Bruce muttered something to Hilton about my vision to spy out new lines. Now I know that I am pretty good at it but when somebody complements you, then its rather nicer than stroking your own ego. It’s a bit like good sex versus wanking.

This morning Tony tells me that Darkhorse gobbled up Sanitorium 25. This means he shook, rattled and railed up it like a turkey, not quite in the same style as the black eagles that were soaring around. I have to give Tony at least 60% of the credit for the ascent because he has forsaken me yet again and climbed with Darkhorse 3 times in the last week or so and nursed him up a variety of routes to train him up.

Another thing that struck me is that all my old mates were up to the ledge and I did not get an SMS or a phone call or an email inviting me. Only poor old Robert can suffer me right now. Last year all my mates would not climb with me claiming I was too fired up and climbing too well and this year, being stuck on my back for 2 months with sciatica I am not good enough? Fine friends I have! I think that perhaps they just can’t deal with me. Shame on them seeing as I have to live with myself all the time and they, only once or twice a week when I climb with them.

Anyway all’s fun, that’s good fun. My butt is a little better and I only spend half the day chewing pain killers and lying on my back. You all better start training up cause there are lotsa routes to do!

Wetpups campout 22 February 2009

Kids being dragged behind a 4X4.____________Chocolate puke on Duncan's sleeping bag


Terror, Mayhem, Chaos and Anarchy. Our work was well done at the Wetpups Grade 1 and 2 Camp-out. The day ended with the kids being dragged behind a 4X4 after being fed bacon and egg rolls by Ray Cadiz. Prior to this every vehicle was clambered on, in and under; every nook and cranny searched and inspected.

But I digress and lets start at the beginning. It was perfect camp out weather. Nice and cool, and clouds threatening rain, which it did. The men precisely followed the rules. They bonded, puffed their chests, postured (just a little) talked about expensive toys, hunting and the like and us older dudes compared our various ailments. We benignly neglected our children who all got on famously around an endless cricket game. Some of the kids were very entrepreneurial selling everything from Marie biscuits to their Dad's cars to each other at cut-throat prices. Marie biscuits went for 50c and the cars, 25c each. Around my fire was a General Surgeon, a Plastic surgeon and me, an Orthopaedic surgeon and despite our children's best efforts there was no business to be had.

We exposed our kids to some very special education about certain things that adults do and kids simply don't and that includes drinking beer, wine and whiskey, telling naughty jokes and communicating in some choice language. And as the evening was just gaining momentum a mom was spotted but she scarpered when we told her that she would have to tour the camp-site and spend 3 minutes in each tent.

The kids ate and drank but I don't recall any of them eating anything that could be called food. Around 11 pm Duncan, my son begged to go to bed. But he really had to plead before I let him and only if he did not brush his teeth. And then an hour later a very bewildered kid came out from a tent into the rain where I was feeling a little miffed as Ray Cadiz was one upping me with his endless supply of fire wood.

This kid said he was getting wet in his tent so, as I had spare sleeping bag, I tucked him up in my van. About 02h00 this kid, Harry, decided he would part company with his meal which had consisted of a litre of coke and a kilogram of chocolate. This he duly puked over Duncan's back and into his sleeping bag. He then wondered off into the darkness back to his tent where Roger nursed him back to health and this morning he was running around fit as a fiddle again. Kids are so strong!

I was just settling down to sleep, around 04h00 and when Martin's dog raided my campsite and I spent the rest of the night listening to him crunching through JJ's spare rib debris.

Next morning another mom was spotted cleaning up after her husband, Clive Elliot, who ostensibly went off to run a marathon, but she also soon scampered off when I tried to get her to pack up my mess.

Of course the day had to end with a moment of high drama when I got locked in the pavilion clubhouse, without a cell phone, when on a visit to the porcelain. I just managed to attract attention with much hollering and banging but I was beginning to think I might have to don my Houdini hat and escape through the roof tiles as the pavilion is a veritable fortress.

Shocking this all must sound indeed. But believe me it was spectacularly successful and we all got to know the inner darker secrets of many new friends. And to boot the Cobras won the Pro20 cricket final and none of us got to watch it on TV!